Lanny's Blog

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New Posts Starting On January 7th

I’ve taken a bit of break over the holidays from writing. However, I made a New Year’s resolution to be more dedicated to this site and actually produce more content. But as we all know, New Year’s resolutions are mostly lies that last about a week.

Hopefully, I won’t fall behind and will be able to produce at least one new post each week. Keep your fingers crossed. If you have any ideas for content or music videos, please feel free to share them so I can use them and not give you any credit.

Just kidding. I’ll link back to your blog so people can check out your work as well. It’s a win-win for everyone.

Cheers.

 

 

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3 More Human Interactions that Always Seem Awkward

In a previous blog post, I talked about awkward human interactions that we all have. After venturing out into the world a little more and dealing with more people, I have discovered even more awkward interactions.

3. Holding doors open- Holding a door open for someone is seen as an act of generosity. If you open a door for a lady you are seen as a gentlemen. And as we all know, women love gentlemen…

Usually I can hold a door open for someone and it’s not awkward, but every now and then I’m presented with a different scenario that catches me off guard. For instance, it feels a little weird to hold open the door for someone who is over 30 feet away and you end up holding the door forever. I made this mistake once, because I could have sworn the person was right behind me. To my surprise, she was a very slow walker.

an old woman using a walker

Correction: She was slow because she was using a walker.

Once you’re committed to holding a door open, you can’t go back on it because then you just look like an impatient jerk. So of course, being the gentlemen I am, I held the door open for 5 minutes until she finally made it. And then to add insult to injury, she didn’t even say thank you. She just looked at me like I was an idiot for standing there so long. And sadly, I knew she was right.

So now before I hold open the door for anyone, I look back and make sure they are at the right distance. That way I don’t look like a creeper standing and waiting for 10 minutes.

It’s also really weird for me when people abuse my generosity. I’ll hold the door for a nice, elderly woman and 20 more people come out of nowhere and will walk in right behind her. Now I’m stuck at the back of a line all because of my kindness. Curse this heart of gold!

2. Shaking hands- Having a good handshake is a great way to make a good first impression. However, the opposite is also true. There’s a certain way to shake someone’s hand without making them feel uncomfortable. Unfortunately, it’s a rarity for me to meet people who do it correctly.

A lot of men like to give a nice firm handshake, which is expected. Other men want to show their dominance by putting your hand in some sort of death clamp and their goal is to break a few phalanges. Here’s a good way to know you’re doing it wrong. If the person you shook hands with has a bone poking out of the skin, chances are your grip was too tight.

a broken arm

This guy really loves to shake hands.

The other type of handshake that makes me feel awkward is the limp wrist and the person makes you shake their fingers. It’s common among women, but what’s even worse is when a guy does it. I’m not sure how to react when it happens.

two people shaking hands

This is what I’m talking about in case you were wondering.

When someone makes me shake their fingers, I almost expect them to curtsey, kiss a ring on my finger or ask me to slow dance. Why not? It’s not like it would make me more uncomfortable.

Whenever someone shakes my hand like this, I’m never sure what to do. I’m afraid if I squeeze I’ll hurt their hand. So what do I do? I shake their dead fish of a hand and apply no pressure whatsoever and try to forget that the encounter ever happened.

1. Elevator rides- Elevator are like boxes of awkward tension. You’re traveling in a little, quiet room with complete strangers. But what’s even worse is when you are in that elevator with just one other person and you’re traveling up multiple floors.

Do you try and make conversation? Do you just stand there quietly and hope you don’t make eye contact? I don’t know! That’s why I’m asking.

Here is another bad situation that has happened to me twice in one week. A co-worker with their hands full, gets to the doors of the elevator I’m in right before they close. It’s in that moment where you feel completely helpless. You let that person down, and you can never take it back. Sometimes you just can’t act fast enough. All you can do is say “sorry” and hope they can hear you.

Now you just have to pray that they didn’t see your face and that they won’t recognize you later in the day. Or maybe, they did recognize you, ran up the flight of stairs and are waiting for you when the doors open on your floor.

a guy standing outside an elevator

Steve, the intern, is so fast.

Can you think of any other awkward human interactions? If so, share them with me in the comments section.

Music Video of the Week- Ed Sheeran

Ed Sheeran is an English singer/songwriter who’s talent has recently come to light. In June 2011, he released a song called, A-Team that debuted at number 3 on the UK charts.

Ed Sheeran

Ed Sheeran.

Before 2011, he played a massive amount of gigs in order to get his work and name out there. After some success, he bought a ticket to Los Angeles to keep pursuing his dream. He played at open mic nights all over the city until Jamie Foxx took an interest in his work. In fact, Foxx was so impressed, he let Ed use his recording studio and stay in his home.

Sheeran then released some more EPs and eventually signed with Asylum/Atlantic records.

His more recent album “+” was released last September and received favorable reviews. If you dig acoustic music then I think you’ll like it.

Here is his song, Small Bump. It’s by far my favorite song from him.

Some other tracks to check out from Ed Sheeran include, Lego House, Drunk, and A-Team.

Music Video of the Week: The Darkness

If you have never heard of The Darkness, then you are missing out on some fine British glam rock. These guys made it big back in 2003 with their album, Permission to Land. The first single off that marvelous album was called, I Believe in a Thing Called Love. With high-pitched vocals, riveting guitar solos and memorable riffs, these guys were one of the best bands to come out in the 2000s.

The band, The Darkness

Unfortunately, the band split in the year 2005 after lead singer, Justin Hawkins, quit the band to go to rehab. Hawkins went on to front his own band called Hot Leg and the other members formed a band called Stone Gods.

However, in March of 2011, the rock gods smiled upon the earth and The Darkness started playing reunion shows. They are now officially back together and about to release a new album.

This week’s video is from their second album and the song is called Girlfriend. I picked it mainly because I didn’t even know the video existed and it’s got a sweet keytar solo. Enjoy!

Do you know of any bands similar to the Darkness? If so, tell me about them in the comments section.

If The 2012 GOP Nomination Was a Movie

I think it would be a great idea if Disney or some other company picked up the rights to the 2012 GOP Nomination and made a movie. Just think, it could cover the whole story of how Mitt Romney rose to greatness and eventually became the nominee. However, there would need to be a supporting cast. Luckily for Disney or whoever, I’ve already made the cast list for them. You’re welcome. Just put the check in the mail.

Mitt Romney would be played by…

Bruce Campbell

Rick Perry would be played by…

Josh Brolin

Newt Gingrich would be played by…

Emperor Palpatine

Rick Santorum would be played by…

Jerry Seinfeld

Ron Paul would be played by…

Magneto

Michelle Bachman would be played by…

Sarah Palin

Herman Cain would be played by…

this random, box of pizza that costs $9.99

Who do you think should play the candidates in a movie? Share your thoughts in the comments section.

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Music Video of the Week- Dashboard Confessional

When I was in middle school, I started listening to the band, Dashboard Confessional. I went out and bought their newest work that was titled, “The Places You Have Come to Fear the Most.” This was the first album that I had ever owned where most of the songs were acoustic. Just one guy, a guitar, and lyrics that I thought were amazing.

a picture of the band, Dashboard Confesional

Chris Carrabba from Dashboard Confessional.

After I had heard this album, I made it my goal to find all of the other works that they had released. There was just something unique and inspiring to me that one guy could create great songs without using a full band. I was also intrigued that his songs didn’t always follow the standard format. Some of the best tunes were written like a story and didn’t even have a chorus.

Unfortunately, that was also the time where the term “emo” started, and sure enough, Dashboard fell into that category. I never really understood that term. Emo is short for emotional, right? What song is completely void of emotion? But, I digress.

Anyways, a few years later, the band released a new full-length album called, “A Mark, A Mission, A Brand, A Scar.” It still remains one of my favorite albums today because every song was meaningful to me.

This week’s video is from that album and the song is called, “Rapid Hope Loss.” (Yeah I know, it’s so emo.) It’s a lesser known track, but the music video is pretty cool. They do some nifty camera tricks with zooming in and out. Check it out for yourself.

Do you know of any other bands that are similar to this one? If so, tell me about them in the comments section.

Three of the Most Dangerous Jobs in America

I work in a cubicle, so it’s safe for you to assume that I don’t experience a lot of danger during the the work day. Sure I might get a wrist cramp from all of my typing or my eyes may get dry from staring at a computer screen. However, there is no real significant danger that could affect me in my day to day tasks.

This got me thinking about the most dangerous jobs in America that no one really knows about or talks about. Sure, police officers, firemen and the military have the most dangerous jobs and I respect them immensely. But, just imagine going to work everyday knowing that you might be staring death right in the face and no one really notices or appreciates the work you do.

After doing some research, I found three of the most dangerous jobs in America:

3) Farmers and ranchers- When I first heard about this one, I was actually quite surprised. What could be so dangerous about milking a few cows or picking some eggs up from the hen house?

Due to my ignorance of what the farming job actually entails, I was shocked that about 300 people died in 2010 due to their career in the farming industry.

a group of hens

I guess the hens are more dangerous than I thought.

Not exactly; it turns outs that most farmers and/or ranchers are killed due to transportation incidents. These people are around heavy machinery such as tractors, plows, cotton pickers and hay balers all day long. One misstep, distraction or simple mistake could lead to an accidental death such as getting run over or drowning in a silo of grain during harvest season. Yeah, that really happens. Speaking of deadly careers where there is dangerous machinery…

2) Loggers- Once again, the most common reason for death in this field of work is interaction with machinery or objects. Let’s use our imagination for a second:

Imagine you’re out in the forrest with a few buddies having a good old time using your chainsaws to cut through some trees. Now, let’s say one of your fellow workers is new to the job and isn’t exactly the sharpest tool in the shed. We’ll call him Steve. Steve starts chainsawing through a tree and doesn’t realize that gravity is going to make that beast of a tree fall to the ground at a staggering speed in your general direction. You look up and see a flash of brown and green as it comes to crush your body.

a huge tree that has been cut down

Most likely, 5 of his co-workers are under that log. Steve is left unharmed.

Another danger is that even experienced loggers can’t always see broken tree tops or branches. In fact, they have a term for broken tops that get hung in the canopy and fall without warning; they are called “widow-makers.” I’m sure that’s pretty self explanatory.

To add insult to injury, loggers make about 14 to 16 dollars an hour. That’s totally worth risking your life for. These guys should be millionaires or at least get health insurance. Not Steve, though.

1) Fishermen-This profession is the ultimate test of man versus nature. When I put the word fishermen, I’m not talking about Orlando Wilson or people who go out on bass boats to catch a few brim for a weekend meal. I’m referring to the people who go out on a fishing boat for days or weeks in order to make their living.

Unlike the other professions where the main concern is machinery, the biggest cause of injury and death for fishermen is the weather.

a boat getting hit by waves

Makes driving in the rain seem a whole lot better.

In 2010, 29 fishermen were reported to have died while working at sea. One statistic even said that for every 100,000 workers, 116 will die, making it the most dangerous job in America.

So the next time you sit down for a meal of fish, crab legs or shrimp, just remember that somewhere, two guys are on a boat risking their lives so you can enjoy a nice, family meal.

Forrest Gump and Lt. Dan

I’m assuming that these are the two fishermen you pictured in your head.

Can you think of any other dangerous jobs that go unnoticed? If so, share them with me in the comments section and tell me why you think they should have made the list.

Music Video of the Week- The Tallest Man on Earth

This week’s video comes from The Tallest Man on Earth, which is a solo project from the singer/songwriter, Kristian Mattson who hails from Sweden.

The artist, Tallest Man on Earth performing.

The Tallest Man on Earth

From what I’ve read and researched, Mattson takes the craft of music very seriously and approaches it with simplicity. He records and produces all of his records from his home. Over his career, he has been compared to the likes of Bob Dylan through his unique vocal style and songwriting abilities.

This is a beautiful live video of him playing his song, “Love is All,” which comes off of his second studio album entitled, “The Wild Hunt.”

Some other great tunes from The Tallest Man on Earth include, “The Gardener,” “King of Spain,” “Where Do My Bluebird Fly,” and “The Dreamer.” If you’re a fan of acoustic guitar driven songs, I think you’ll really enjoy his work.

Do you know of any other artists that are similar to this one?

Easter: A Holiday for Violence

This week I was trying to brainstorm ideas for this blog entry. I was trying to think of a clever Easter post that would be both insightful and humorous. However, I failed to construct such an entry mostly because of my laziness and lack of time.

Then it came to me. Just like a chocolate bunny delivered from the hands of heaven, I stumbled upon an amazing story of both stupidity and a constant reminder that the human race is slowly, but surely, evolving back into Neanderthals.

a neanderthal

My apologies to the Neanderthals who read this blog.

I’m actually deeply upset because I was shocked that such an awful news story took place in my home state of Georgia. Way to make me proud… Here it is:

An annual Easter egg hunt in central Georgia was canceled because, in past years, the parents grew increasingly violent when trying to collect eggs for themselves and their children. Now the article doesn’t mention anything about the children being violent. Just the parents.

So now because of the “parents” acting like a bunch of asshats, the children don’t get to celebrate and enjoy a wonderful holiday celebration.

This Easter event is actually one of the largest in the state of Georgia, which means a lot of children will be missing out.

Perhaps, the parents shouldn’t be allowed to attend or take part in Easter anymore. Or perhaps they should be locked up for the benefit of all mankind. I vote for the latter. Just read one the quotes!

Allen said he canceled this year’s hunt because parents caused children to be hurt. He said that in past years, one woman was injured and several children were “trampled on.”

Children were trampled on? I don’t recall that being one of the traditions of Easter. Let’s see, we color eggs, buy chocolate bunnies, take pictures with the Easter bunny, and…what else? Oh yeah! Trample small, helpless children! That’s what we’ve been forgetting.

What I really don’t get is why anyone would become violent over Easter eggs? It’s just plastic filled with candy. You know you can just go to any store the day after and get candy for like 10 cents. It’s not worth going to jail over.

a woman being arrested

"I was just trying to help my baby get some Easter eggs, yall!" If you read it in a southern accent, it's more effective.

What’s your reaction to this story? Share your thoughts and opinions in the comments section and have a Happy Easter. Just don’t trample any small children.

You can read the full article here.

3 Things I Didn’t Like About The Hunger Games

First off, I want to say that I really enjoyed The Hunger Games, and would most likely go see it again. I thought it was a really creative idea and did a great job of bringing the book to life. Did I read the book? No. All I had to do was find a 13-year-old girl who explained it to me in every detail.

spark notes

It was like a quicker, yet more annoying version of Spark Notes.

However, I’ll admit that there were 3 things I didn’t like about The Hunger Games. Not all of them have to do with the movie, but mostly the overall experience.

3. I was sitting in a sea of teenagers- I remember what it was like to be a teenager. In fact, I use to be one. But for some reason, I felt so out of place seeing The Hunger Games. Maybe it’s the fact that I can grow a beard or drive a car?

What it boiled down to was it felt like I was in a conversation where I knew nothing about the topic. Everyone was talking about the book and I had no idea what it was even about.

What was really odd was that when the movie started, everybody started clapping and I felt like I was in high school all over again. All the cool kids were clapping like it was an inside thing, and I felt left out.

a kid left out

Not even my invisible friends hung out with me.

It was a very surreal experience to be in a theatre with so many young people. They were full of energy, life and excitement. All those things started to fade for me around the age of 18.

My initial thought was to run away, but luckily, an old man and a few people my age walked in later, so I didn’t feel that badly.

2. The movie should have been rated R– Think about that for a second. Okay, good. This is the one big complaint I had with this movie.

If the Hunger Games had received an R rating, there would have been so much more violence and blood. Which, let’s be honest, that’s what most people wanted to see anyways. I didn’t care anything about the romance or back story, just get to the part where it’s every man for himself!

I understand that if the movie was rated R, then the target demographic couldn’t have gone to see it. But now that I’m over the age of 21, I don’t care about the people who are too young. I’m old enough! If it had been rated R, maybe the camera wouldn’t have been so shaky during the fight scenes and I could have left the theatre without a headache.

a guy with a headache

I'm not sure if this guy has a headache or telepathic abilities.

If the movie had an R rating, I think the actions scenes would have been a lot deeper and realistic. I mean, how often do you get to watch kids in an arena engaging in combat? It’s a pretty rare occurrence.

1. I had to sit through some crappy previews- Unfortunately, there were some pretty horrible previews before the movie started. I also believe that I was in a theatre with every Twilight fan in the county.

As soon as they showed the Twilight 20 second preview, all I could hear was high-pitched voices squealing. I’m just glad that they are finally putting an end to the series. Even though, 3 or 4 years from now, they will most likely do a reboot.

But then, I started thinking. Will the Hunger Games take over and be the new Twilight movies? This is a real concern to me because I think I’m going to enjoy the series, but I don’t want to be surrounded by squealing tweens when I decide to go to the theatre, but I digress.

Luckily, there were some previews to make me feel more comfortable. The Avengers and Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter were two of the exceptions, but if I see the preview for Battleship or GI Joe: Retaliation one more time, I might just lose my mind.

Anyways, what did you think of the Hunger Games? Are you a bigger fan of the book or the film? Let me know in the comments section!

Jennifer Lawrence

And yes, the best part of the movie was Jennifer Lawrence. Just kidding, it was Lenny Kravitz!

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