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Archive for the tag “humor”

Advice for Graduating Students

It’s an odd feeling. From the age of 6 to 22, all I knew was school. That was it. My biggest responsibilities were to go to class, get good grades and not to get anyone pregnant. And since I haven’t received any DNA tests or angry letters, I’m pretty certain I succeeded at all of those.

This time last year I was freaking out. I was days away from graduating college, and not a freaking clue where I was headed or how I was going to get there. It was a feeling of not having direction. Being uncertain. But it was exciting to think that there were possibilities.

people graduating

Nice hats, losers.

My biggest fear upon graduating college was getting a job. That’s all anyone ever talked about. I can’t tell you how many times I was asked the all important question: “What do you want to do with your life?”

The truth is, I still don’t have an answer for that question and I’m completely okay with that. It’s okay to not know what the future holds.

If you did know what was going to happen in the future, you wouldn’t have to worry about working because you could win the lottery or gamble yourself into prosperity and everyone would hate you.

Since it’s been a year since my graduation, I figured I would share some words of wisdom and things that I have learned about the real world. Enjoy.

3. Internships– The first thing I did out of college was tear up websites like and in order to find a job. After I realized that everyone and their grandmother wanted 6-10 years of experience, I knew I was pretty much screwed. Unfortunately, the only way to get experience is to work for free or for very little. Enter the internships.

After the job hunt wasn’t going so well, I began looking for internships just to get my foot in the door. Two months after graduation, I was working an internship for minimum wage, which is better than an internship where you work for nothing.

In high school, my teachers always said, “Once you get a college degree, the world is your oyster! You’ll make more money and have a better job!” I guess they didn’t see the economy going in the crapper either. You would think guidance counselors would be on top of things like that.

Sure the job market is rough these days, which is why internships are even more important. If you’re willing to work hard and do well for little or no pay, then maybe, just maybe you’ll get a job out of it. I interned for about 7 or 8 months before I was offered a job. I would recommend patience and persistence.

In my opinion, it’s better to be getting experience and making very little than to be sitting around looking for a job that requires tons of experience that you don’t have. You may just have to bite the bullet and work for nothing, but at least you’re getting your foot in the door, right?

2. Expect Changes A lot of things changed for me when I graduated. People changed, situations changed, and life changed. I think the hardest thing for me to accept was that people changed.

It was so weird to me when I began getting wedding announcements or seeing people change their relationship status to “engaged” on Facebook. I guess the problem was that in college, I sort of lost track of my age. I felt 18 for 4 years, and when I graduated it was hard to believe I was 22. Sure I could grow an awesome beard, but I guess I never really felt like an adult. I felt like an adolescent with stubble.

The biggest lesson I learned is that when college is over, people move on. Everyone kind of goes their separate ways and does their own things.

Relationships end, people change, people grow and people move on. Changes are unavoidable, so just go with the flow and accept that there are things you have no control over. Eventually, you’ll find your place in this crazy mixed up world. Just do what you can so your place isn’t being a stripper or a homeless person.

1. Be thankful that it’s overYou did it! Way to go big guy, or big girl. Wait.

What I’m trying to say is that you should feel accomplished. You went to school and got yourself an education. Good for you! You powered through those 4 years(or 12 years) and finally got that piece of paper. Now you just have to get out there and compete with the other millions of people with the same degree.

But seriously, be glad it’s over. No more projects, no more papers, no more tests. It’s actually a pretty nice feeling knowing you accomplished something you worked so hard for. Now get out there and make the world a better place to live in!

And if you’re going to grad school, I have no advice for you. Good luck with the debt, I suppose? That’s all I got.


2 Things I Wish I Had Learned More About in School

Once you start getting into the real world, you begin to experience things and realize that you don’t have a freaking clue what’s going on. Maybe that’s a bit dramatic, but it’s easy to feel overwhelmed when you get done with college. I wish, during my 18 years of education, that I would have learned more about the real world and less about math and literature.

william shakespeare

If this guy wrote in American, maybe I'd be more inclined to read his work. Doubtful.

Here are 2 things I wish I had learned more about  in school:

1. Money/Taxes/ Big Purchases– I really wish that schools would make a real world class that was mandatory for all students. To be completely honest, I know nothing about taxes except from what I learned from the board game, Monopoly.

monopoly guy

Even he knows I'm screwed.

I just think it would be practical to learn about taxes, how to save money, and the ins and outs of making huge purchases such as a car or house. Teach me what to look for and how to know if  I’m getting a good deal or not. When I look around at the economy and I see so many people losing their belongings, it really makes me wonder if that could happen to me in the future. That’s a really scary thought.

Sure, I took a Banking and Finance class, but I didn’t really get much out of it. It was also an elective class, so it was an easy A and wasn’t required. I was hoping to learn how to balance a checkbook, fill out my tax forms, or learn about credit. Instead, all we did was read a book and never applied it to the real world. So now when people talk about 401K’s or income tax, I have no idea what’s really being talked about. But as an adult, I just pretend and nod like I have a clue and then Google all the terms I didn’t understand.

wikipedia logo

One of the best "teachers" you will ever have.

2. Politics and Government– I took a few history classes in my day, but I still don’t know a lot about our government and how it works. For instance, I don’t recall anyone ever explaining to me the differences between Republicans and Democrats. In fact, the only time I learned about the differences was when I was at family gatherings and I would listen to arguments. But I really didn’t understand most of it, and I left feeling confused and scratching my head.


Just like this.

There should be a class that explains politics and government in a way young people can understand.We should learn about what each side is all about. Instead of memorizing the presidents, I wish we had focused more on current issues, that way when I was old enough to vote, I’d sort of have a clue what was going on. Terms like foreign policy,  national debt, The United Nations, and the Federal Reserve were things I learned about on my own.

I think it’s important to learn about historical events, but I would have also like to have been informed about events that are going on in the present. Young people need to learn about the voting process, what each presidential candidate stands for, and how the whole political system works. Instead of teaching  for the billionth time who the Pilgrims were, mix it up and talk about how our country ended up in a recession. That way the future generation can avoid the same mistakes.

Who knows? Maybe this information was covered in depth during school, but I just didn’t pay attention. That is very likely.

girl with twins

I'm just glad I payed attention in Sex-Ed. Yikes.

What are some other life lessons that you wish you had learned more about in school? Tell me about them in the comments section!

Man Gets Charged With DUI Twice In One Night

Someone call the guys from the book of world records. This guy named Robert Brodnick from Pennsylvania got charged with a DUI twice in one night. How does that even happen?

A doctor shrugging.
Not even science can explain the stupidity.

The worst part about this story is the fact that the guy got his second DUI 15 minutes after he got the first one. And to make matters worse, he got stopped by the same cop! How stupid can one person be?  Once he was arrested the police found out that Robert’s blood-alcohol limit was at least double of what the law allows.

Brodnick then said he only had a few beers and wanted to drive his new car home. I’m no alcohol expert but I’m pretty sure a few beers won’t get you as hammered as this guy actually was.

A guy drinking a beer.
I don’t think I’m drunk…I know I’m drunk, officer!

Check out this link for more information on the story.

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