Lanny's Blog

3 Complaints About the Amazing Spider-Man Movie

I know what you’re thinking. The new Spider-Man hasn’t even come out yet and I’m already bitching and moaning about it. I’m aware that I haven’t seen the movie and no reviews have come out yet, so it’s not fair of me to judge a book by its cover. However, before you judge this post, you hypocrites, maybe you should realize that I’m not judging the movie. I’m just voicing a few complaints that I have with it. However, I will be approaching this reboot with an open mind and high hopes of success. I think all Spider-Man fans are, especially after that monstrosity that was Spider-Man 3.


Hang your head in shame, Spider-Man. That’s not rain, those are the tears of your fans.

So here are my 3 biggest complaints so far from watching the trailers and reading about the film:

3. Emma Stone isn’t playing Mary Jane- I understand that Spider-Man 1-3 kept building on the relationship of Peter and Mary Jane and that the reboot wants to focus on a different story. However, when you cast someone who could play and looks like Mary Jane and then give her a different role, I get pretty upset.

Personally, I really enjoy Emma Stone’s work. From Easy A to Zombieland, the actress has a lot of talent that I admire and that you really don’t see that often anymore.

She would have been perfect for the role of Mary Jane and instead…they make her Gwen Stacy? The big problem I have with this decision is that Gwen Stacy dies in the comics. So are they planning to kill off and replace Emma Stone in the sequels? And if they do that, who will they get to play Mary Jane?

Emma Stone

Oh…this is Jenna Stone. Emma’s twin. She’ll be perfect for the role of Mary Jane.

What I’m saying is that Emma would have made the perfect Mary Jane unlike that poor excuse, Kirsten Dunst. She’s talented, beautiful and didn’t star in some stupid movies about cheerleaders bringing it on, which is a term I still don’t understand. So unless the writers are planning on keeping Gwen Stacy around, they are going to have a tough job finding someone better than Emma Stone.

2. The Lizard is CGI- I absolutely hate when movies make characters using CGI. It may just be me, but when the CGI characters interact with humans and real objects, it just looks completely fake and stupid. Am I the only person who wants to see puppetry come back into the movie business? Probably.

The people making The Amazing Spider-Man should have looked into the past where another green, Marvel, CGI monster failed to meet my expectations. Because I’m confident my opinion matters to them…

the Incredible Hulk

You’ve had 3 chances, Hulk.

I just don’t get it. Why in the world would you make the bad guy using CGI? That’s like casting someone like Topher Grace to play a huge and important role like Venom in a Spider-Man movie…oh wait…that happened…and still haunts my dreams.

1. It opens on a Tuesday- Why is it opening on a Tuesday? I’ll have to wait an entire day to go see it. I can’t go to the midnight showing and you should know this, Hollywood.  Yeah, I could man up and go see it, but I probably won’t. The last time I went and saw a Spider-Man movie at midnight, the only part I enjoyed was listening to the very vocal man next to me pointing and laughing at how horrible it was.

At one point, I thought I dosed off and dreamed that Spider-Man turned into an emo douche and starting dancing around. After I saw the film 4 more times, I realized it wasn’t a dream and that it actually was going on. Yeah, it took 4 times for my brain to fully comprehend the horrific scenes that were taking place.

So basically what I’m saying is don’t break my heart this time, Spider-Man. I don’t think I can handle it again.

But if it sucks, I shall dry my tears on the cape of The Dark Knight when it out performs you at the box office. Enjoy your two weeks of being number one.

What are your thoughts about the new Spider-Man movie?


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