Lanny's Blog

True Story, Bro #1

I’ve decided to try something new and I’ve come up with a new category for my blog. This is called, True Story, Bro. Basically, I’m going to tell you a crazy story that has happened to me and you get to read it and say, “Wow, that was great” or “Wow, that was a waste of time.” Either way, I’m okay with it.

So today I’m going to tell you a story about when my Ipod was stolen out of my car. So curl up in a warm blanket, grab a cup of hot chocolate and let my writing soothe you as I reminisce and tell you a story.

man sleeping
Don’t you dare fall asleep!

So one night, my brother and I decided to go see a movie. If I recall correctly, we went to go see Battle: Los Angeles. I called a friend of mine to come join us and we agreed to meet at the theatre.

My brother and I arrived early, because we wanted to see the previews. We get our tickets, picked our seats and then my friend showed up right before the movie started. He walked up to my seat and looked at me with a very grave and serious expression.

“Did you drive your car here?” he asked.

“Yeah I drove because my horse and carriage are in the shop,” I replied.

“I think I just saw two kids sitting in your car.”

“Are you serious? Let’s go check it out.”

Now when he told me that my car had been broken into, I really didn’t believe it. I just assumed there was a car in the parking lot that looked just like mine and this was all a misunderstanding.

But sure enough, as soon as I got to my car, there were two thugs hanging around it. I walked up to my car, and to my surprise, the doors were unlocked and the seats had been moved!

angry face
No one moves my driver’s seat!

I got in my car and saw that my Ipod had been stolen. Wait, let me clarify. In hindsight, I was actually robbed by two nice criminals because they had the decency to steal my Ipod and leave the case. Wasn’t that sweet of them?

I got out and called the police, and my friend went to confront the two guys. He told them they could give back the Ipod or we would call the cops. So the two guys walked off.

I called the cops and told them what had happened. Here’s how the conversation went.

“Yeah someone broke into my car and I need a cop to come arrest the guys,” I said.

“What’s the physical address of where you’re at?”

“I’m at the movie theatre, it’s the only one in the area.” (I was actually more specific, but for your sake I’ll leave some details out.)

“What’s the address?”

“The guys are getting away! I don’t have time to find out the address. This theatre is a pretty popular place, can’t you find it or look it up yourself?” I asked.

“We need the address…”

So I ran into the theatre, cut through the line and asked for the address. No one working there knew it. They had to find a brochure with the address and handed it to me.

While this was going on, my friend was walking behind the guys to keep up with them so we could tell the police where they were headed.

I ran back outside and the dispatcher asked me if I could give a description of the guys. I told her I was following them, but had to run into the theatre. She asked why I wasn’t following them now. I then told her that I was trying to follow them, but I got distracted trying to find out the physical address.

Finally, I caught up to my friend and we walked at a safe distance behind the two guys. They turned a corner at a Home Depot where there were sheds and buildings. I was afraid that they may be hiding in one of them and decided to wait for the cops, because I didn’t want to get stabbed or shot over an Ipod.

a gun
I don’t care how many acoustic love ballads were on that Ipod, I wasn’t willing to take a bullet for them.

So we waited and waited.

Finally, a cop showed up and got out of the car.

“What are you boys doing out here tonight? Please take your hands out of your pockets so I can see them,” he said sternly.

“I’m the one that called you…” I replied.

So after we cleared up that my friend and I weren’t the criminals, the cop rode around the parking lot to look for the guys. They were long gone by then.

A few minutes later, another cop showed up. He asked us the same questions. He then asked my friend, and this is a direct quote, why “he didn’t just beat the sh*t out of them.” I was confused at that point.

I looked at the officer and said, “What would you have done if you saw a guy beating up two other guys in a parking lot at night? Chances you would have arrested my friend and given my Ipod back to the guys whole stole it.”

(That’s not actually what I said, but it’s what I was thinking.)

Long story short, the only people who ended up in the back of a cop car that night was my friend and I. The cops gave me a ride back to my car and nothing was done about my stolen Ipod.

Three days later, my brother and I went back to the same theatre to see Battle: Los Angeles. By the end of the film, I realized that those criminals did me a favor, and tried to keep me from seeing that crappy movie. So for that, I say “thank you.”

True story, bro!

Have you ever experienced something like this? If so, tell me about it in the comments or on my Facebook page.

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