Lanny's Blog

Archive for the month “October, 2011”

3 Things I Would Change in the Workplace

It’s very rare to hear someone talk about how much they love their job. In fact, it’s so rare that it almost frightens me. Why do so many people work jobs that they don’t like? I know we all need money to survive and people have families to provide for. Excuses, excuses. Just kidding.

Then I started thinking what things could be done in order to make everyone’s work day a little brighter without them having to quit their job?

man taking nap at desk

Yes, nap time was the first thing I thought of.

So in my attempt to revolutionize the working world, I came up with 3 things that I would change in the workplace.

1. Shorter hours– This just seems like a no-brainer. Who came up with the conclusion that we should work 8 hours a day, have 8 hours of free time and have 8 hours of sleep? First of all, that is complete bullcrap! If you have an hour commute, guess what? That either takes a way an hour from your free time, or from your sleep time. My feelings on this subject are that people should only work 5-6 hours a day. Why you ask?

It’s not because I’m lazy. I think the best thing about shorter hours is that it gives people more time to live life. You know life. That thing that is slowly slipping by while you are sitting at your desk. I don’t think we were made to work the majority of our life away inside a cubicle with a computer.

people in cubicles

Pictured: The real reason man was put on Earth.

Not only will shorter hours allow you to live life, but you will also get to spend more time with your family and friends doing things that you enjoy.

Also, the whole evolution of work hours has changed drastically. It used to be 9-5, and now it has turned into 8-6, or 7-6. Why do we do this to ourselves? It can’t be healthy. Working too many long hour days can cause addictions to coffee and fast food. It can also lead to sleep deprivation and a little thing called “early death syndrome.” Sitting around for the better part of the day also makes us too tired to exercise when we have the free time. I propose we make work days 5-6 hours, and allow people to live!

Side Note: Every one always looks forward to Friday. I think if we made working hours shorter, people wouldn’t be living for just one day out of the whole week.

2. More work from home days– Commuting is a french word for “aneurysm.”

old man using computer

Don't look it up old man, just take my word for it!

I think we can all agree that driving to work sucks. I only have to drive 20 minutes to get to work and it’s the longest 20 minutes of the day. I have no clue how people drive over an hour to work.

Just think, if more companies had work from home days, I think a lot more would get accomplished. You can roll out of bed, do some work, take a break, eat, and do whatever. Of course, I’m assuming that if you’re reading this, then you are a responsible worker who is capable of getting their work done without a boss looking over your shoulder. Because that’s usually the type of person that is attracted to this blog.

Work from home days can help save gas, money, and allows you to be there for your family while getting work done. It also allows people, who can’t afford to commute that far, an opportunity to get a better job than what they could find close to their home. It would also allow me the pleasure of getting work done in my pajamas.

guy wearing a onesie

Oh yeah ladies, I rock a onesie!

3. Longer lunch breaks– I get an hour lunch break so I can’t complain. But some people I know only get 15-30 minutes for a lunch break. Are you kidding me? What can you eat in 15 minutes?

Short lunch breaks also promote bad health and bad eating habits. If you have a short break and you didn’t prepare a lunch, you’re going to be filling up on junk food. Junk food will in turn, make the rest of the day seem horrible because you aren’t properly nourished. Lack of nourishment causes poor performance and the next thing you know, you’re fired!

Donald Trump

Donald Trump gets a quarter every time someone says, "You're fired!" So I now owe him 50 cents.

Think about it though. If you allow your workers to have longer lunch breaks, they can eat healthier, eat slower, digest and get back and most likely do a better job for your company.

So there you have it, shorter hours, more work from home days and longer lunch breaks are great ways to make the work place a better place. Now let’s all hold hands and just get along.

What are some other improvements you’d like to see in the workplace? Tell me about them in a comment!

3 Things We Should Stop Drinking

I’d like to consider myself somewhat healthy. I try to eat right and exercise, because that’s what I was taught in gym class.

Kid getting hit with ball.

I was also taught who to pick last for sports. Gym class was cruel.

But recently, I’ve been doing some research about what we have learned is healthy may not be necessarily true. I ask that you take the information I’m about to share with a grain of salt and decide for yourself. Here are 3 things we should stop drinking that you might want to consider:

3. Bottled Water– Now I’m not saying you should stop drinking water all together. That would just be stupid. And dangerous. And deadly. I’m just saying that realistically, tap water is actually better for a few good reasons. For one, bottled water costs a lot more than tap water. It’s odd that we complain about gas prices, but then pay $1.50 for 20 ounces of water. It’s also been proven that tap water is cleaner. When you have companies like Coca-Cola and Pepsi bottling water, you have no idea where it really came from.

man in tub

The main source of bottled water.

It’s also important to mention that most water bottles don’t get recycled and just add to the trash and can hurt the environment. Also, for us lazy people, tap water is so much easier to obtain. You just go to the faucet and turn it on. That’s it. We have clean water running to our homes and we mock it by going out and buying water in plastic bottles. I’m ashamed of myself, because as I type this, I have two water bottles on my desk. Hypocrisy!

2. Soda– Wait a minute? You’re saying a drink filled with sugar and no nutritional value is bad for your health? Why yes. Yes I am. Soda is actually pretty bad for you and can lead to numerous health problems such as diabetes, obesity, osteoporosis, tooth decay, gastrointestinal problems, liver disease and gout. In moderation, I’m sure soda is fine. I mean, most people use it for caffeine to get through their day. Now if you’re drinking 10-12 sodas a day then there might be a problem with that.

a kitten drinking soda

Side note: Kittens can easily get addicted to soda.

But what’s baffling to me, is that most people know sodas are full of calories and sugar, and yet the soda machines line every hall in our schools. When I was in high school, there were soda machines outside of the gym. So after a nice, hard workout I could replenish my body with some nutritional Pepsi-Cola.

1. Milk– It does a body good, right? Well in a way that’s debateable. From what I’ve read, there are unwanted ingredients in milk such as hormones, antibiotics and pesticides that can be bad for us.

girl drinking milk

These pesticides are delicious!

Also, less than 40% of adults retain the ability to digest dairy properly. I found this quote on usatoday.com:

Being able to digest milk is so strange that scientists say we shouldn’t really call lactose intolerance a disease, because that presumes it’s abnormal. Instead, they call it lactase persistence, indicating what’s really weird is the ability to continue to drink milk.

Humans are the only species that continue to drink milk after infancy. The problem with milk is that it is used to make so many delicious things such as ice-cream, cheese and pretty much every baked good like cakes and pies. So just suck it up and drink it!

So there you have it. What are some other drinks or foods that you have researched and found to be bad for your health? Tell me about them in the comments section!

5 Songs that Make Me Go Over the Speed Limit

Music has a weird way of toying with our emotions. It can take us to places of peace or put us in a pumped up, adrenaline rage where speeding up is like crack cocaine. It’s usually after a heavy rocking song, that I look down at my speed and see that I’m exceeding the speed limit…

a kid on a car

...and possibly endangering the lives of children.

Luckily, I have discovered that my road rage is caused by 5 songs on my Ipod. Here are the 5 songs that make me go over the speed limit:

5. Blindside- Yamkela

To be completely honest, I have no idea what these guys are screaming and I don’t know what the song is about. All I know is that the guitar sounds like a swarm of bees coming in for the kill. This rock sound will get you going and have you driving faster than you should be.

35 mph sign

I'm just going to assume the 3 is really an 8.

Best lyric: “Gunpowder, burning under my skin!”

4. A Day to Remember- I’m Made of Wax Larry, What Are You Made of?

This song’s title comes from the movie “Night at the Museum.” That’s not a joke, that’s really where the title came from. When I think hard rocking, screaming music, yeah I think of “Night at the Museum.”

night at the museum

Now that's hardcore.

Best Lyric: “You know I’ve got you like a puppet in the palm of my hand. Don’t you let me down!”

3. Taking Back Sunday- You Know How I Do

Taking Back Sunday has been one of my favorite bands since I was in high school. These guys are amazing live and this song is one of their best. The opening guitar riff just gets my adrenaline going and I scream out all of the lyrics, out of tune of course.

guy holding ears

I sound like a blender on full blast with metal in it. Kind of like Celine Dion.

Best lyric: “We won’t stand for hazy eye anymore!”

2. Foo Fighters- All My Life

This is arguably the best song the Foo Fighters have ever written. It’s got heavy distortion, a great beat, and it’s just amazing. When you first hear it, it’s very calm, but when it blows up, it hits you like a hurricane. Plus Dave Grohl is playing a see-through guitar! After I saw this video, I wanted to go out and buy a guitar just like it. I’m positive if I had a guitar like that, I could write rock hits. Maybe not. Wishful thinking, I suppose.

Best lyric- “Done, done and I’m on to the next one.”

1. System of a Down- BYOB

This is one song that when it comes on the radio or on my Ipod, I just have to turn it up to an ear-drum-damaging volume. The beginning riff and the screaming, just make me get pumped, which is a dangerous thing to feel behind the wheel of an automobile. This song has screaming vocals, fast and heavy guitar riffs: it’s just the ultimate song that can get you in trouble while driving.

getting pulled over

"So let me get this straight. You ran a stop sign, hit a mailbox, broke the speed limit, and drove your car into a convenient store, all because you were playing air guitar? Here's a warning! I completely understand!"

Best lyric: “Blast off, it’s party time!”

So there you have it. 5 songs that potentially make me a dangerous driver. What songs get your adrenaline going? Tell me about them in the comments section!

Mythical Creatures are Making News

I was looking through the news today and I noticed a reoccurring topic. There are a few mythical creatures making the news. Some of the articles I read were pretty odd, but also really fascinating. Here are a few I came across:

1.  The Abominable Snowman– Scientists are saying that they have found evidence of an abominable snowman in Russia. They are 95% sure that the footprints, den, and markers used to show territory are that of a Bigfoot-like creature. 95% sure huh? That just shows a lack of confidence in yourself. I think scientists that go after things like the Lock Ness Monster and Bigfoot can’t come out and say that they are 100% sure. More than likely they would be 100% fired and lose 100% credibility and their spouse would take 50% of their belongings if it turned out to be a bear or something.

a bear

"My hypothesis was correct! Bigfoot looks and acts just like a regular bear! No one will believe this!"

They have also found “Yeti hair” that will be tested to find out its origin. Let me also point out the legend of the Yeti is used in this area of Siberia in order to attract tourism. Chances are, there is no snowman, but keep the dream alive! If you want to read more about it, here is the link to the article.

2. The Kraken– If you are unfamiliar with what the Kraken is, it’s basically a mythical, underwater creature that is known for sinking pirates ships, just like Disney is known for sinking Pirates of the Caribbean.

Jack Sparrow

It wasn't your fault, Mr. Depp.

Paleontologist, Mark McMenamin, believes that the 45-foot-long skeletons of the Ichthyosaur that have been found, were actually prey for the Kraken. There really isn’t a great deal of evidence to back up his claims, since the cause of death of the Ichthyosaurs has yet to be determined. So even though this story may be complete crap, it still seems pretty cool. Read more about it and decide for yourself.

Do you know of anymore mythical creatures that have made the news lately? Or do you have a favorite mythical creature? If so, tell me about them in the comments section!

October 18th Should Be a Holiday!

If you have no clue what is happening on October 18th, then we can no longer be friends. Are you ready? Here it comes….October 18th, Batman: Arkham City is coming out! I’m so excited I want to smack an old lady with a fish!

shocked old woman

Oh Goodness!

Let me start off by saying that I’m not really into video games. Apart from playing a few titles each year, I really don’t play that much. This year, there were only 2 games that I even cared about playing. Those games: L.A. Noire, and Batman: Arkham City. Which from now on will be referred to as BAC because I’m lazy and you’re lazy. I don’t like to write and you probably don’t like to read!

nerd reading

"I thoroughly enjoy a good page turner!" said the one person who reads this blog.

BAC just looks like an amazing game. I loved Arkham Asylum and I have high hopes for this sequel. These games finally allow me to go around and do all the cool things that Batman can. I no longer have to tie a sheet around my neck or wear a cheap Halloween costume and pretend anymore. And my parents can finally take me out in public without being ashamed of me.

kid batman

My friends and I at my 21st birthday party.

Everyone at some point in there life has wanted to be a superhero, and I’m hoping that BAC will allow all Batman fans to feel like they are actually in his shoes, or boots, or whatever he wears. I’m going to keep my fingers crossed, hope for the best, and be in line on the 18th to hopefully buy a copy.

Also, on a side-note, this game is the first to make Robin actually look cool.

Robin

Finally, Robin looks cool, and Batman doesn't look creepy for having a young boy as a side kick!

Are you looking forward to Batman: Arkham City? If so, tell me about it in the comments section!

3 Commercials that I Find to be Ridiculous

Everyone has seen certain commercials, that are just laughable. The acting is atrocious or the product being sold is stupid. I’ve encountered a few of these commercials in my day, but I have narrowed it down to my top 3. Enjoy.

3. Binder & Binder– These guys are apparently lawyers, even though it’s hard to tell from the commercial. Check it out.

First of all, the guy doing the voice-over makes me laugh. He’s got a deep, soothing voice, but he’s reading a script that can only be described as comical. And then they show the guy putting on the cowboy hat….are you kidding me? It’s almost like the guy is trying to be a superhero or a cheap version of Indiana Jones. If he is going to defend me in court, I hope to God he’s not planning on wearing that hat. Not only will my case be dismissed due to laughter, but I would have also given my hard earned money to this clown so he can add more goofy hats to his collection.

a cheeseburger hat

If that guy's a lawyer, then I must be President of the United States.

2. Certain Dri– Certain Dri is the # 1, doctor recommended, clinical strength antiperspirant. I know that because I’ve watched this horrible commercial more times than I’m willing to admit. Here it is.

The premise of this commercial just seems retarded to me. A hot, blond chick just randomly strolls up to some dude she doesn’t know and talks about how bad she is sweating. I’ve never seen that happen before in real life. Then the commercial gets even dumber. After the guy tells the chick he is a doctor, she’s suddenly attracted and starts hitting on him. Excuse me sir, but that woman just said she was all sweaty! I would have told her to get lost and hit the showers. She clearly shares too much information and is more shallow than the puddle of sweat she has created on the floor.

a caution wet floor sign

Gross...someone get that sweaty chick a mop.

1. Xenadrine featuring Ronnie from Jersey Shore– Why would any company hire someone from Jersey Shore to promote their product, especially when there acting is as bad as this:

Wow, that’s painful to watch. If you didn’t stick forks in your eyes, then you noticed this poor guy doesn’t know what to do with his facial expressions or his hands during the commercial. Why didn’t the director or anyone else tell him that he was doing a horrible job?

And I don’t believe for a second that this guy takes Xenadrine. Maybe he does, I don’t know. I’m sure he does other things that are bad for his health. Like steroids. Alcohol abuse. Illegal drugs. Nasty women. And the list could go on.

Do you know of any really bad commercials? Send me some links or tell me about them in the comments section.

Also, I just want to say that I suck at spelling the word “commercial.” Even then I misspelled it and had to go back and change it. Tricky word I suppose.

PETA’s New Controversial Billboard Ad

PETA has launched a new billboard ad in order to make people think and possibly adopt the vegan diet. However, in my opinion, I feel the ad may have not worked out the way they had hoped it would. Here’s the billboard.

Peta ad

Mmmm...humans are tasty!

Ashley Byrne, the Campaign Manager for PETA, thought that with the recent shark attacks in the news, that this billboard would make people think. She also said that people think sharks are the deadliest predators, when in reality, humans are the deadliest predators.

So my initial reaction to this was confusion. Why does PETA want us to stop eating humans? They are quite tasty.

zombies walking

I asked these guys and they agreed. And then ate my dog.

But then I looked for a deeper meaning and they are trying to say that we should treat animals the same we want to be treated. When we eat meat, it’s the same as when a shark eats a human….right? We are all just trying to get some food.

However, I will not go on a vegan diet until the sharks and other deadly creatures decide to do the same. Why should I sacrifice the sweet taste of meat and let all the other predators enjoy it? So PETA, once you guys can strike a bargain with sharks to stop eating people, I’ll stop eating sharks. Wait…I don’t think I’ve ever eaten a shark. So really the sharks are the bad guy here!

I do understand the vegan lifestyle. It’s admirable and if it’s something you want to do then by all means go for it! But don’t force people to go vegan with tasteless ads that are offensive to…I don’t know…the victims of recent shark attacks that took 800 stitches to sew up their bodies so they could live and one day be able to walk after being viciously attacked by a shark with razor teeth!

And to be honest, this ad doesn’t make me feel bad for animals, it just makes me want to kill and eat that shark!

a shark swimming

"Come down here and see what happens if you try and kill me! I'll be waiting boy!"

What do you think about this ad and the message it sends? I’d love to hear your opinion in the comments section!

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