Lanny's Blog

Man Blames Ghost for Marital Problems

What comes to mind when you think of ghosts? Well, they are scary, they haunt people, and they roam around and say “boo!” A lesser known fact about ghosts, that you may not know, is that they occasionally enjoy punching women.

A man in Wisconsin named Michael West was arrested after allegedly punching his wife in the face, which is horrible. When the police arrived at the scene, Michael’s wife accused him of trying to strangle her twice. He then punched her in the face when she called the cops. Like any guilty man, Michael said that his wife “fell several times” and that’s how she got injured. And then, Michael had the balls to say a statement so bold and so stupid, that I was dumbfounded and also impressed at the creativity. He told authorities that, “a ghost did it.”

Casper
This is an amateur sketch of the ghost.

Now I know most of you are thinking, “there’s no way that guy is telling the truth. He’s just trying to get out of going to prison.” But the Huffington Post seemed to think it’d be a good idea to get a paranormal researcher’s opinion to see if Michael’s claims could be legit. I wish I was making this up.

I’m about to show you a quote that I can’t believe was even needed in this case. But here it goes:

“Reports of ghosts attacking people or making them do things are extremely rare and there is no solid evidence to support them,” Ron James told HuffPost Weird News. “You won’t find anyone who will vouch for them.”

First off, Ron James is a “filmmaker who specializes in the paranormal” or as normal people call it, “unemployed.” Second, how are you going to find solid or tangible evidence if it’s a ghost? Aren’t they notorious for being, you know, invisible? On the other hand, there is a great detective duo that has never come across a case they couldn’t solve…

Blues Clues
“Invisible clues? Our specialty. Give us 24 hours.”

Then Ron James delivers yet another quote.

James says the only way West’s claim might be legit is if the house has had documented paranormal activity.

Wait a minute, so if Michael West can come up with some evidence or documented paranormal activity, he could possibly get away with beating his wife? Sure all the tangible evidence points to this guy beating his wife, but maybe, just maybe, a ghost really did do it. It’s not like the guy has a history of spousal abuse or anything. Oh wait…

West’s wife says his violent behavior has increased and there had been a previous no-contact order filed against him.

The article then talks about his “shady, checkered spousal abusive past.” Now I’m not a betting man, but I’d probably bet that this guy got upset and beat his wife. However, I do think it would be hilarious if the police in Wisconsin believed him, and started a man hunt for a ghost.

handcuffs
Pictured: A ghost in handcuffs. Wait. We lost him again.

Do you know of any other crazy news stories or do you have an opinion about this one? If so, share your thoughts in the comments section.

You can read the full article here.

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One thought on “Man Blames Ghost for Marital Problems

  1. I think I’ve just found my new excuse for everything.

    But seriously, though, people need to take responsibility for their own actions. Stop blaming God, Satan, “temptation,” entertainment, etc.

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